Here on the frontier, There are falling leaves, Although my neighbors are all barbarions…And you? You are a thousand miles away. There are always two cups on my table.

Anything from Anthropologie. It is the middle class woman’s cheap imitation of a French thrift store.

I especially like the authentic rust covered lawn furniture holding handcrafted soaps and lots of “whatnot”.   I want a whatnot now!  I totally could sell Anthropologie my lawn furniture for their store displays.                   

Tres chic! Can they pick it up before bulk trash gets here???                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                             

A bottle of single-malt scotch. Because I am too old for beer, it gives me gas.  I’m too snobby for cheap alcohol and I want to have something in the house that my old man won’t snicker at.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                     

Organic Bath products made by someone named Holly. Because Holly would make the best most pricey organic stuff. Like soaps with tiny bits of grass and twigs. I love that. Holly Organics would tie a raffia bow around all her mass-produced …organics.  A charity associated with Holly Organics would be an added bonus.    See what you can do.                                                                                                                                    Maybe just a pint of  Ben and Jerry’s instead.                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      

  • A copy of the DVD White Chicks. Because it will get this white chick laughing seeing the Coen Brothers  doing dead on imitations of  white girls.
  • Teva shoes. Well made, imported from the middle east and so avant-garde.   They are the go to shoe for yoga class, bootcamp and the weekly psychiatric session.    One wants to make the right impression.

There that should get you started.

Get moving kids my birthday is Tuesday.

Oh and please no more Godiva chocolate (my relative’s default gift setting) or spa treatments (I work in a spa remember?)

This is gmom,

peace out.

Happy Birthday to me!

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Comments on: "Best Birthday Gift For Middle Class And White (me)" (10)

  1. Happy early birthday gmom! Hope it’s a wonderful day and you get to eat lots of delicious cake with your family! 🙂

  2. Dishwashers are good too! 😉

  3. Happy Birthday!

  4. Happy Birthday, GMomJ. I hope your day was filled with smiles and surprises (of the good kind). Cheers!

    • Thanks Miss Diane,
      My kids bought me a dishwasher.
      I love it!
      My eldest is taking me out for a surprise something Tuesday night. I hope to blog it.

  5. Happy early birthday, Gmom! I hope it’s memorable and spectacular. Yay, Aries!

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