Here on the frontier, There are falling leaves, Although my neighbors are all barbarions…And you? You are a thousand miles away. There are always two cups on my table.

Archive for June, 2011

Ah the joys of nothingness………..

Damn dog.

Down Cujo.

Down!

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The Artful Dodger’s Weekend: Hoo At Home

Hoo peering through the peep hole of the high chair.

Hoo’s Momma went away for a few days.

Gmom, Rose and Grandpa took over.

We are having a busy but awesome time.

We bought a Hoo- size motorcycle to amuse him so if he had a meltdown we had a good distraction handy.But the boy is doing fine, so we just gave it to him.

He did take one spill off of it which required a band- aid,several kisses and quick application of one dum-dum lollipop.

The toe scrape was from chasing Cujo with a handful of  sand from the sandbox.

For a special treat we let Hoo use a real screwdriver to meddle in the workings of a broken fan. It’s his current mechanical obsession. Anytime he started walking away with the screwdriver I say, Hoo get back to fixing that fan or give me the tool. He would give me his blue eyed grin and get straight back to work on the fan. I expect with all the banging it will be be working again in due time.

We have watched a fair bit of Baby Einstein videos both in English and Spanish.

The English versions are quite lovely with Pachelbel Canon in D Minor playing beautifully while a soft female voice recites barnyard animal names. The pictures show sweet images of baby cows, chicks and horses.

The Spanish version has the theme to Mama Mia playing with a child reciting animal names.

Rat, snake, iguana and turtle.

I don’t know what to make of that.

Hoo watching Baby Einstein vids

It’s been busy. But a lot of fun.

Hope your weekend was good.

This is gmom.

Wiping the sticky from the keyboard.

Peace out from Hooville.

We Are Family Like That

When my brother’s fatal prognosis was told to our family. We were grouped together surrounding his wife. Hands all around her. On shoulders. On knees. Supporting and holding.

We are family like that. We hold each other up.

We listened intently to everything the doctor was saying not noticing my mother walking away. My elder sister noticed first.

Where is Mom?

We went to the hospital hallway and saw my mother running down the hospital hallway.  For myself, I had a moment of wanting to let her go. She had the right idea. Run Mom Run. But there was no where to run to. We went after her. Like the Keystone cops. We caught her, crying and struggling, out of control. We surrounded her. Someone brought a chair.

It’s okay mom, it’s okay,it’s going to be okay…

We put hands all around her. Held her. Supported her.  All of us, Including my sister in law.

We are family like that.

Now I understand why she ran.

But there really is no running from life.

These 5 revitalizing days alone at the beach have reminded me, that I am not alone in my struggles.  I have hands all around me. Holding me. Supporting me.

We are family like that.

Things You Should Try At Least Once (or not)

This is actually two topics in one. I have run away from home. The pressure cooker of some home events drove me to take the sage actions of a friend and skedaddle to higher ground for a breather.

So I write to you from the beachfront. I am watching the waves rolling inexorably into the shore. I am eating bagels and cream cheese with lox, the TV is turned on a rerun of Project Runway, I have a six-pack of beer cooling on ice.

It’s all wrong, but exactly what I need. A  short break from a difficult reality. Hubby didn’t exactly give me his blessing, but I did notice he put the ‘easy-pass’ in my car’ and called to check up on me a few times. All good. This is working for me.

So Rose and I, you know Rose, my 21-year-old? Works full-time and goes to college full-time? My own little overachiever. She and I were discussing things you should try at least once in your life.

We settled on:

Sky diving

Scuba diving

Rock climbing

Bungee jumping

Singing in front of a crowd

Go surfing in Malibu

Visit India

Climb an active volcano

Participate in Burning Man

Now of course we then went on to name a bunch of things we thought we wouldn’t try.

So here is that list too. Be sure to add yours in.

We wouldn’t try cocaine or heroin. One time may be one time too many.

We wouldn’t…

Get a big ‘name tattoo’  on our face.

Run a marathon. (ewwwww)

Join a ‘hold your breath’  under water contest.

Run naked through church.

Read War And Peace. Uh no.

See the Taj Mahal. I seen it in Las Vegas it ain’t all that!

Backpack through the rainforest. No No No.

Learn an indigenous language. I’ll stick to pig-Latin.

Listen to Enya for 5 hours straight. Just shoot me instead.

Give someone directions, even though you have no idea where they are going.

Get drunk and ruin someones special day.

Photocopy your butt. Why do people do that???

Join a self-help group. I actually did that once with my sister and they kicked us out for laughing.

Last but not least, marry someone you met in an online dating site who you have only met one time. Don’t ask! I know someone who did this. What a disaster.

So there you go kids.

What are your ideas. Hmmm?

This is gmom,

at the beach,

watching the waves and wondering,

why do I live in the city????

Peace and I am outa here!

Remembering Jeff: Like A Prayer

This is how I remember it.

This is how it was.

——————————————————–

It’s called a secondary cancer.

A migratory zone.

Where the cells go to garden.

The brain.

We  sat in the waiting room praying for him.  Losing hope as the hours passed,

as the 7 hour surgery turned into 22.

Finally, the surgeon came out and told us what we already knew.

It was not good.

But for now he was in recovery.

My sisters and I stayed at the hospital and waited for a chance to visit him, for the chance to see that he yet existed and was still amongst us.

At some point in the night the nurses removed the breathing tube.

He spoke in a broken record, PeeWee Herman voice not his own.. “tumor tumor tumor”.

“Tumor’s all gone, honey, tumor is gone.”

I didn’t know if he heard or understood me as he continued his senseless mutterings.

Suddenly, he turned towards me and with  eyes unfocused and snapping left-right, left-right said

“Sing sing sing sing”.

So I sang,

to my brother.

““““““““““““““““““““`

Life is a mystery, everyone must stand alone.
I hear you call my name and it feels like
Home.

When you call my name, it’s like a little
Prayer. I’m down on my knees, I wanna take you
there. In the midnight hour, I can feel your
Power. Just like a prayer, you know I’ll take you there

 

The hard part wasn’t his leaving.

The hard part was being left.

He stayed long enough to say goodbye.

This is gmom,

peace out.

T’ank You, T’ank You.

(On the anniversary of my brother’s passing I am grateful for the small miracles of today. Hey Jeff, miss you bud, you would have loved this story, you would have loved Hoo)

————————————————————————————————————————-

Baby boy Hoo was mad rushed into the house by his momma Eggs on Friday. “Mom! The daycare called me, he is burning up with fever!!!” My daughter was panicked, struggling to hold a hysterical Hoo.

Undress him, let’s check his temperature.

I watched the mercury rise in the thermometer tube as Eggs pinned Hoo across her lap.

103….103.6……104….104.2……105….

Okay let’s get him into the bath, get the tylenol and call his doctor.

I poured cool water over his shaking body. It was controlled chaos.

We wrapped him in a sheet and rushed him to the pediatrician who saw him immediately.

Hoo sat on Eggs lap as the doctor examined him. He cried continuously.

The doctor did a strep test with the looong q-tips swirled down his throat.

Poor Hoo, he gagged hard, when he could draw breath he cried out “T’ank you, t’ank you.”

That is a Hooism for “thank you”. The doctor was charmed by our little darling. The we waited until a nurse came in to draw

blood. Hoo cried and cried and when she finished he cried “T’ank you, t’ank you.” She also was

touched by this tiny tot. She said that was the first time a 23 month old thanked her for poking them.

The doctor came back in and listened to Hoo’s chest again and pronounced him to have

pneumonia. Of course Hoo turns red-eyed and says, “T’ank you, t’ank you.”

Eggs and I shared a secret smile over Hoo’s head.

You see dear reader, whenever Hoo wants someone to leave he says “Thank you.”

Today Sunday he is better. Bouncing around as recovering children do.

Watching Sesame Street and eating jelly toast.

T’ank you God, really T’ank you!

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