Here on the frontier, There are falling leaves, Although my neighbors are all barbarions…And you? You are a thousand miles away. There are always two cups on my table.

Posts tagged ‘Dog’

Alcohol: It’s What’s For Dinner. Featuring Cujo The Dog

Cujo The Dog Ready For A Fun Evening

Husband is gone for the duration.  Saving lives, solving problems, hopefully not reading this.

Me. I’m enjoying a nice summery beverage.

Whiskey straight.

Straight out of the bottle  while standing at the kitchen sink in case I gag. Bad reflex when one is not use to drinking. I use to drink. Pretty pink and soft snowy colored drinks with fruit. Dressed up with girlfriends, going out,dancing, pretty, flirty.

See what happens when you have kids! You are reduced to slugging booze over the kitchen sink. Effects the same though.

I’m funnier, I’m pretty and I’m great company. Just ask Cujo the dog, who by the way has suddenly learned English. I know! I (hic) can’t believe it either!

Say something Cujo

I in turn have learned to bark. So between his English and my barking we’ve pretty much got the dictionary covered.

It turns out Cujo greatly resents my keeping an organic kitchen, and frankly I can’t seem to remember why I do either.

I don’t really care about cows. I’d eat most any animal if it’s seared properly and has a nice char.

Cujo! Come back here! Play inside.

Cujo would be yummy I bet.

Americans, we don’t eat dogs or cats.

It’s a cultural thing.

In the Asiatic countries people eat all sorts of crap delectable yummies. Monkeys, dogs (including border collies) bats, snakes.

Cujo let's pretend your the crinimal and I'm an (hic) ociffer.

I’m certain if Taco Bell made a Border Collie Burrito we’d all be chowing down no problemo.

Juco why you hanging with Bart inside come on don't be ascared-redy-cat.thing

Where my little buddy Cujo go?

 Cujo, here Cujo.

I dunno whas goin on with Cujo. He usually (hic) very friendly.

———————————————————————————————————–

Cujo actually goes in and out of the house through the opening in the screen at the door.

Alas, since last evening he has lost all ability to speak..and won’t come near me.

I’m sure in a few weeks he’ll get over it.

This is gmom,

peace out.

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Cujo The Dog II

Hubby bought a thousand pds. of dirt,
in 40 pound bags,
to put down in the backyard garden.

Cujo munched into them,
now there is manure dirt,
all over the back patio.

(My husband is so mad),
“When are you going
to take that dog
to training.”

I am embarrassed
to tell him,
I already have.

Cujo was kicked out of
puppy kindergarten.

He cried and went nuts,
when he saw the other
normal happy dogs.

He needs private classes,
they said.

My son Bart came in yesterday.
Cujo likes him best,
next to me.

He kept jumping on Bart
and nipping at his shirt,
“Hey”,Bart said,
“Off fuktard!”

Fuktard?

Did you just call my dog a fuktard????

Cujo loves to play
chase in the yard.
Maybe a little
over-enthusiastic.

He runs as fast as he can in a big circle,
and as he goes past me,
he jumps at my hands.
It was cute at first,
when he was so shy,
I was glad to see him
come out of his shell.

Now it’s a pain
in the neck.

He is a big chewer of shoes,
and other things leather.
He chewed up one pair of work shoes
that were hubby’s.

Wow. was he mad.
Then he chewed up his belt,
which meant,
he was on the bed.

I bought the apple bitters,
yuck spray,
to repel dogs from chewing.
Contains bitrix I am sure.

Seems to help.
As does the proliferation of
chew toys,
all over my house.

So I hope things are looking up.

“Oh no!
What are you doing now Cujo???
What is this?
You chewed up
Daddy’s brand new work shoes!”

CUJO!!! You fuktard!

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