Here on the frontier, There are falling leaves, Although my neighbors are all barbarions…And you? You are a thousand miles away. There are always two cups on my table.

Posts tagged ‘husbands’

The Annapolis Date And The Van-With-No-Reverse

Who drives a van with no reverse???? 

No one in their right mind maybe?

No reverse, that means no backy- uppy.

What the heck? How can the van have no reverse???

Imagine that said in a very loud voice, mine to my mild-mannered husband.

Tell me dear, how long has this piece of crap van not had a functioning reverse?

Weeks??? This is unacceptable. (That’s me being patronizing).

We were in Annapolis on a date. Yes kids even after 30 years of marriage this grandma and grandpa go on dates. That’s all you need to know.

We were going to walk along the waterfront after dropping an oil drum at a restaurant. It was 10 p.m. I was driving the van which had about 8  (200 gallon) empty drums behind the seats. I had pulled in to a parking spot behind the restaurant when my husband started shouting, “Don’t park head in, don’t park head in!!!”

WHY???

“There’s no reverse!!!!”

WHAT????? No Reverse???? Honey that is just messed up….

Too late, I was parked. Husband got out and had to push while I gunned the engine of the van-from-hell to try to force some backward movement. We need help. Some guys walking by came over and put their weight with my husband’s and the van was pushed out of the parking spot.

I climbed into the passenger seat muttering, I am not driving this lousy piece of….

We pulled to an alley behind the restaurant and parked on the street. Husband unloads the drums. It was dark and vacant back there. I kept my eyes open for trouble from the relative safety of the van-with-no-reverse.

“I’ll be right back.” and husband jogs off. What? Where is he going? Leaving me in this dark alley in this good for nothing van! I was outraged.   Until the police car pulled up alongside the van. Great!

I started to get out of the van until the cop shining a flashlight in my face yelled “Stay in your car!”

Okay fine, you don’t have to yell.

Now my heart is pounding in my chest. I am sitting in a dark van with several very large oil drums in it. I have a rag tied around my head.  It’s only been 5 days since Osama was killed, and Annapolis, if you don’t know is neighbor to DC. The security is tight.

I figure I have 2 maybe 3 minutes before the Cavalry shows up and my face is on the pavement. I’m scanning the van to think could Bart or my husband have any weapons on board that I need to declare to the cops  but I don’t dare move, especially not to look for a weapon. No that will definitely raise the ire of the cop watching me and probably get me shot. No I’ll just sit quiet-like and curse my husband for running off and leaving me here.

Then just as suddenly the back of the van flies open and it’s husband grabbing out another drum and talking a mile a minute.

“They need another drum, they are doing a bang up business, saw 2300 people in the last 2 days…” he doesn’t see the cop.

The police car rolls forward as my husband is carrying the clearly empty drum off the van. The cop slowly drives off. I want to cry.

Husband gets into the van. “Now we can take that walk on the waterfront! Romantic!” He rubs his hands together and smiles like a kid.

Take me home.

“What???”

Just take me home.

“I don’t understand you.”

You just ran off and left me here. There was a cop who yelled at me to stay in the van. He thought I was a terrorist or something.

“You’re fine, there’s no cop.”

There was! Now take me home.

“Try to do something nice for you…”

Just drive. Oh and first thing tomorrow this ‘gadawfulpiecacrap’ better be at the mechanics!

No reverse! Give me a break!

“Wow! That’s nice talk dear.”

I can laugh about it now. But at the time? I was fit to be tied. No reverse…who drives a car with no reverse……………………………………………………………………………………………………………………….

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This Is What Love Is

My husband started a biofuel business several years ago. It was and is his dream. He worked in IT for almost 30 years. During the last few of those he studied and planned this business.

He has worked all day everyday since quitting his last job and making his business model a reality. One year into the project we were out of money, credit and facing the closing of the business.

We had a sit down, serious talk.

Should he go back on contract with a computer firm or do we hang on a few more weeks on my paycheck?

As we talked, I weighed the options for myself. I hadn’t seen him this  happy for years. To close the business now would be a huge blow to him. Could we hang on?

We decided to turn the heat way down in the house.

Eldest son “The Chef” brought leftovers from his catering jobs and we ate from that. The kids all contributed what they could from their jobs. We hung on.

The business began to turn a profit.

Years later, he still works from early morning till late at night.

Last night he came in after midnight. He had spent a long day placing oil drums behind restaurants and training a new driver. After a hot shower and some food he climbed into bed and we cuddled up to keep warm.

We keep forgetting to turn the heat back up in the house.

This is gmom,

peace out.

Roasted Garlic Recipe

Cut the top off the garlic head to expose most of the cloves.

There is nothing better to spread on bread then roasted garlic.

Butter is good but garlic is outrageous!

It’s low in calories, is heart healthy and really packs a punch in flavor.

The aroma alone gets everyone’s mouth-watering,

and when your company sees the beautiful golden heads on your table they will be impressed with your culinary skills.

This dish is so impressive but ridiculously easy to make.

My kids eat it on bread, drop it into their soup and put it on vegetables.

Whatever is leftover I squeeze into mayonnaise to make aioli.

Enjoy this simple little treat.

Pour a teaspoon of oil over the top of the garlic and then sprinkle with italian seasoning or pepper. If sodium is not a problem a sprinkle of salt is good. Then wrap the aluminum foil around the garlic tightly. Put it into an oven safe baking dish and roast for 45 minutes.Unwrap when you are ready to serve. Can be eaten warm or cold.

Here is the easy way to make roasted garlic.

You eat it by using your butter knife to slide out the individual pieces (cloves) of garlic.

In The Morning My House Looks Like The Bar Scene From Star Wars. (Recipe For Breakfast Bars)

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It’s 3 a.m.

I hear the front door open and close.

Work boots pass over head.

Then a chair scrapes the floor.

Bart‘s home.

He stocking foots it to the laundry room where he strips off his oily work clothes.

I hear the shower go on….off.

He heads to bed for a few brief hours of sleep,  with the tv on.

I slip back into a semi-sleep until Hoo wakes at 6.

I hear Hoo’s bottle hit the floor around 6:30.

The signal he is up and ready for company.

This morning the kitchen looks like the bar scene from “Star Wars”.

It’s a busy day in the biofuel business.

Everyone is on deck.

The center of the constellation is the bossman.

My husband.

The most interesting, constantly evolving  person I know.

He drinks a coffee and nurses a morning headache but always keeps an upbeat attitude.

He sits in the dining room and reads the Wall Street Journal.

Bart rolls out of bed bare-chested in pajama pants and heads for the coffee.

He’s eats a big breakfast.

Eggs and steak or 3 grill cheeses.

Jonesy  knocks at the door ever polite, our fix it man, only 22 like Bart.

All smiles,

happy to make it for breakfast.

He eats whatever I put in front of him.

Genady, the Russian worker is smoking outside.

He never comes in the house.

I’ve stopped trying to get him to come in and instead let Bart take food out to him.

I wave and say “Morning” to him but all he says with his big smile is,

“Nice day,nice day”.

10 years in America and still no speakee English, yeah right!

Edward Norton‘s diatribe from “25th Hour” passes through my head when I see Genady and I wonder if he’s done time and that’s why he won’t come inside.

The last of the motley crew is Aldy, young and shy, and always stinking of trap grease.

I question Bart,

“Are you pouring oil over his head? How is he getting so filthy?”

“Aldy go change your clothes and take a shower man!”

He does and comes back with his thick hair slicked back.

Much better.

We are cornering the market on Tide and Oxyclean.

So another day begins as they all pile out to the trucks.

Genady and Bart lingering over coffee and a cigarette by their truck.

Waving to Hoo who stands by the screen door waving and calling to them.

I pick him up.

Come on big boy.

Time to get dressed.

These breakfast bars although not healthy enough to replace a well-balanced breakfast are good enough in a pinch or for those who won’t eat breakfast.

They make a great mid-morning snack too.

As you adjust the recipe to suit your own tastes just be aware that the recipe does not do well with flax or flax-seed or with drier cereals like chex.

Have a great week WP kids.

Be safe out there.

If you see an oil truck on the B’more streets be kind to them.

They are my boys!

Breakfast Bars

————————-

2 cups brown sugar  

1 cup peanut butter

1 cup butter

1/2 cup water

2 tablespoons vanilla extract

2 eggs

2 and 1/4 cups flour

1 teaspoon baking soda

1 teaspoon salt

1 and 1/2 cup rolled oats

1 and 1/2 cup raisins

1 cup chocolate chips

6 cups Honey Nut Cheerios

1.Preheat oven to 375 F

2. In a large bowl mix the sugar, peanut butter, water, vanilla, and eggs.

Combine the flour, baking soda and salt.

Mix into the batter.

Mix in oats, raisins, chocolate chips.

Bars unbaked by the 1/2 to 3/4 cupfuls on the bake sheet

Carefully stir in the cereal.

Drop 1/2 cupfuls of batter onto ungreased cookie sheet leaving space between bars.

3. Bake for 12-14 minutes until bars are browned at edges.

Let cool completely on cookie sheet before moving to storage bags.

Terrific Breakfast Bars with Coffee

This is gmom, Cujo and family,

Peace out.

 

Cujo not allowed in the kitchen with so many people underfoot

Just for Kicks : Computadora or Computador????

My darling daughter in law sent this to me.

Just for fun.

Have a laugh.

gmom and Cujo.

A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.

‘House’ for instance, is feminine: ‘la casa.’
‘Pencil,’ however, is masculine: ‘el lapiz.’

A student asked, ‘What gender is ‘computer’?’

Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether computer’ should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give four reasons for its recommendation.

The men’s group decided that ‘computer’ should definitely be of the feminine gender (‘la computadora’), because:

1.. No one but their creator understands their internal logic;

2 The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;

3. Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and

4. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your paycheck on accessories for it.

(THIS GETS BETTER!)

The women’s group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine (‘el computador’), because:

1. In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;

2. They have a lot of data but still can’t think for themselves;

3. They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and

4. As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model…

The women won.

Send this to all the smart women you know…and all the men that have a sense of humor. 🙂

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